Modern Day Wedding Guide to Save the Dates and Invitations

Times are changing, and so is the etiquette for weddings. Gone are the days of the one million and one rules our grandparents had to follow when they tied the knot. However, although modern brides have more flexibility in what they should and shouldn’t do, it is important to note that there are several etiquette rules that haven’t changed. The Weddings by Funjet team has gathered the best list of do’s and don’ts for your wedding invitations and save the dates. The great news is that most of these rules apply for both a stateside wedding and destination wedding. Keep reading for the best advice on save the date and invitation etiquette, and learn how to stay ahead of the game when it comes to planning all things wedding stationary.

Do: Speak to the level of formality of your event.

The save the date and invitation will set the tone for the remainder of your wedding events. Be sure that your stationary reflects the level of formality, whether formal and elegant or relaxed and casual. Draw the line when it comes to casual, don’t run the risk of leaving out important details!

Do: Coordinate the color scheme and theme.

Now is the time to have some fun with your color palette and décor design! Let your colors shine in your save the dates and invitation suite. The colors on the invitation will help guests know the scheme, and will also deter them from possibly dressing similar to the bridal party.


E+H Creates

Do: Get a head start.

Get ahead of the game and start your research early. Order example proofs and compare your options. Waiting until the last minute to design and order your invitations can quickly lead to panic.

Do: Get organized on your important dates and deadlines.

Check when the final guest list is due to your venue and caterer. If you are hosting a destination wedding, it is crucial to note when guest reservations must be made for hotel and airfare.

#ConciergeTip: If your destination wedding is through Weddings by Funjet, connect with your Concierge on the best dates to list on all of your wedding materials.

Do: Set a budget, and price shop.

Every bride is budget savvy these days. It is really important to take the time to sift through the dozens of options between a local and online vendor for your save the dates and invitation needs. While it can be tempting to opt for the best deal online, remember that the personalization you’ll receive through a local vendor is hard to beat.

Do: Keep track of RSVPs.

Create a spreadsheet or guest tool that will allow you to keep track of RSVPs, plus ones, dinner selections, etc. This will come as a blessing later on in the wedding planning process. Consider numbering each reply card to ensure you receive all of them back, this will help you when it comes time to reach out to any guests that may have not replied.

#ConciergeTip: If you’re planning your destination wedding with Weddings by Funjet, keep an eye out for rooming list details from your accommodation specialist. This will work as your official RSVP from guests and make wedding planning a breeze.

Do: Send save the dates on time.

For a stateside wedding, send save the dates four or more months prior. For destination weddings, send your save the dates as soon as you have your date and accommodations ready so that guests can plan accordingly.

Do: Send a formal invitation after your save the date.

If guests receive a save the date, they are going to expect to receive a formal invitation to follow. Be sure to be clear in your communication. Send your formal invitation for a stateside and destination wedding no less than 8-10 weeks prior to the wedding date.

Do: Include your wedding website.

A wedding website is the best way to provide the greatest amount of information to your guests regarding everything from wedding day timelines to transportation for guests and accommodations.

#ConciergeTip: If you are hosting a destination wedding, include your complimentary custom event page URL created by your Weddings by Funjet Concierge.

Do: Include a pre-addressed, pre-stamped envelope for the RSVP card.

Trust us, we know it is a great way to save money, but it is truly poor etiquette as many people no longer commonly carry stamps. Even more importantly, this gives guests a reason to send RSVPs late and no one wants this to be the case. Think of the convenience of your guest above all else when it comes to this part of the process.

Do: Become an expert in wording. 

We can’t express enough how important this is. As we stated above, the envelope is the first impression your guests get of your wedding and your invitation speaks to the formality of the event. Addressing and wording can vary depending on who is hosting the event and who is receiving the mail. Our suggestion is to do heavy research beforehand to have all your ducks in a row. We particularly love this guide for tips.


Don’t: Invite someone to pre-wedding events who is not invited to the wedding itself.

It is really important to remember this rule! Inviting guests to pre-wedding events and not to the wedding is a big no-no. This can commonly be viewed as “gift grabbing” and poor etiquette. Run tabs on guests who are invited to all events.

Don’t: Write details about your wedding registry on the invitation.

This is a big no-no! Drop all details about registry or gifts on your invitations or save the dates. The best etiquette for this is to have a wedding website which has a tab with information about registry information.

Don’t: Fall behind on thank you cards.

Get started as soon as RSVPs start rolling in! Keep a running list of who is attending. As soon as wedding gifts begin arriving, get started on your thank you cards so you don’t fall behind, trust us, you’ll thank us later for this awesome advice!

Don’t: Give every guest a plus one.

The new rule of thumb is this: if a guest is married, engaged, or living with someone, you should absolutely invite their significant other regardless of whether or not you have met them. Everything aside from this is really up to you. When it comes to a destination wedding, the rules change a bit. Because your guests are investing a significant amount of time and money to travel for your wedding, they should always be allowed a plus one, even if you haven’t met them.

Don’t: Stretch your limits by trying to address the invitations yourself.

Although it can be tempting to try and get your invitations address in haste and just do it yourself, we cannot express how important it is for your addressing to be beautiful and proper. With this being said, be aware of your handwriting and perhaps look into an investment of a calligrapher. If the budget is tight, ask around your family and bridal party for someone who may have a bit more formal and neat style of penmanship. This is your first impression to your guests, after all.

#ConciergeTip: Our friends at Minted offer free addressing on envelopes! Take advantage of this by contacting your Wedding Concierge today. Ask about the exclusive discount available to Weddings by Funjet couples.


Don’t: Settle or assume anything.

When it comes to any stationary sent to wedding guests always be sure to have the most vital information on there. Think who, what, where, when, and why. Most importantly, be sure to include where your wedding will take place on your Save-the-Date. Guests should be able to know if travel will be needed on their behalf.

Don’t: Use funky and hard to read fonts.

Be mindful of the type of font you will use on any save the date or invitation card. It is important that all guests are able to easily read and understand the message you are sending. Save the crazy fonts for the wedding décor, like signs and seating arrangements.

Don’t: Say too much in too little of space.

There is limited space on any invitation style. Be direct and to the point in your communication. Don’t include too much information; this is what a wedding website is for!

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This post was written by Ashley Grossmann

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